I can’t believe we are at the halfway point in Habits of Friendship. This week we will be taking a deep dive in Emotions. Habits of Friendship: Emotions in full of all the skills students need to understand their emotions and care about others. Enjoy your Habits of Friendship: Emotions journey!
What is Habits of Friendship?
Maybe you missed the first post that introduced The Habits of Friendship program. If so, head over here to read up on the program and get your free, printable progress tracker. You can also download the first two lessons here:
In short, after Habits of Learning took shape in my mind, I began to realize it was an incomplete program. Our lives are not just about learning, they are about more than that.
If you have been here for a while, you know I talk a lot about goal setting and balance. When I am talking about those things, I often quote one of my favorite Bible verses: Luke 2:52.
And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man.Luke 2:52, KJV
In this verse we see that as Jesus grew from child to man, he developed in four areas of his life:
- Wisdom: Learning and education
- Stature: Physical health and wellness
- Favour with God: Spiritual development
- Favour with man: Social and emotional development
Habits of Learning focuses on the “wisdom” part of that verse. Habits of Friendship will focus on “favour with man”. These are the two modules that will be taught, two times a year at A One-Room Schoolhouse.
Once you have completed the progress monitoring circle listed in the introductory post, you are ready to dive into week one Habits of Friendship: Emotions. Here is all you need to do to get ready for this week:
- Download the lesson plan (link below), print it if desired.
- Bookmark this blog post that includes live links to use for each lesson containing a video.
- Print off the resources included in at the end of this post.
- If desired buy or check out the book Each Kindness (You may also just listen to the book in the video links.)
- Make sure you have some coloring supplies on hand.
- On day five, you will need some small rocks and a bowl of water.
Now you are ready to go!
Remember to Practice
The general instructions for the Habits of Friendship stay the same from week to week. This week (and from here on out) you will want to encourage your children to do the exploration activities from the previous week’s lesson.
This may be a copy sheet, hymn study, or memorization. Maybe they might like to read a book from the list or watch one of the video links. It does not matter which activity they do, what does matter is that they are still thinking about and learning about the previously studied habit.
Furthermore, make sure you are always looking for ways to praise your children as they progress in the previously studied habits. THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO DO!
This focus on continual practice and praise will help further development and generalization. It reinforces the idea that we are always working to improve ourselves.
Below are some of the special elements that you might want to read about before completing the Habits of Friendship: Emotions lessons.
What is Emotional Intelligence?
Peter Salovey and Jack Mayer coined the term “Emotional Intelligence” in 1990; subsequently Dan Goleman, a psychologist and science journalist with the New York Times popularized the concept with his 1995 best seller Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ.
“‘Emotional intelligence’ refers to the capacity for recognizing our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, and for managing emotions well in ourselves and our relationships.” Dan Goleman, 1995
Five Emotional Competencies
When developing Emotional Intelligence, five competencies should be focused on. All these skills are developed in the Habits of Friendship and Learning programs. The first three are the focus of the Emotions lessons. Although these skills may take a lifetime to master, beginning the journey in youth will propel the student to a strong awareness of emotionally health.
These are the five basic emotional competencies as out lined by Dr. Dan Goleman:
1. Self-awareness: You know how you are feeling and how your emotions and actions can affect others.
2. Self-regulation: You can understand and control your emotions.
3. Empathy: You can put yourself in someone else’s place and understand how they are feeling.
4. Motivation: You understand your motivations and can shift from external to internal motivation.
5. Social skills: You have compassion and respect for others. You can compromise and work as a team.
Fostering Empathy in Kids
In a recent book called: UnSelfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World, Dr. Michele Borba gives a nine-step program to help parents cultivate empathy in children. She explains developing empathy is a key predictor in how a child thrives in the future.
One piece of advise Dr. Borba’s writes about, concerns how to respond when kids speak or act in a insensitive way. Rather than punishing, she suggests a “do-over” using the “CARE” acronym:
C: Call attention to the uncaring behavior
A: Assess how uncaring affects others, helping kids to understand another’s perspective
R: Repair the hurt and make amends
E: Express disappointment of uncaring behavior, while stressing expectations for caring behavior in the future.
“The trick is to look for those discipline moments when we can help our children grasp how their actions affect others so it stretches their empathy, and one day they can act right without guidance.”
Grow Our Community
We are growing rapidly and we are so pleased with your support. Keep tagging your friends, using our hashtag (#habitsoffriendship), and sharing your Habits of Friendship journey.
Let’s keep the social media ball rolling and share this program with your friends! Take pictures and videos of your Habits of Friendship: Communication lessons. Post these on Facebook or Instagram. Use the hashtag #habitsoffrienship and tag @aoneroomshoolhouse. Follow the Schoolhouse and our hashtag to join other Habits of Learning users!